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Glenn Beck & Sarah Palin Know The Best Way To Honor 9/11 Victims Is To Score As Much Dirty, Sexy Money Off The Poor Schmucks As Possible!

In “honor” of the thousands of innocent American civilians murdered nine years ago, on that fateful autumn day in 2001, überpatriots Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck will be a holding their own personal 9/11 event in Alaska to “honor” their own uncanny ability to dupe the dumb public into pouring moose piles of dirty money into their already fat, overstuffed, blood-soaked coffers. For freedom!

That’s right! For just the bargain basement rate of 2,977 murdered souls, plus between $73.75 and $225 for entry, you too can watch Glenn Beck and Sarah Palin weep faux tears for the fallen and real tears (of joy!) for themselves in their their latest, greatest(!) get-rich-quick scheme to steal money from everyday, hardworking men & women, and honor the nation by dishonoring all those who tragically lost their lives in the worst terrorist attack in U.S. history. Hooray!

Because this 9/11 rally is very much for-profit! Oh, you betcha!

These two gutless swindlers are charging up to $225 for entry, with the most expensive tickets offering a “meet and greet.” There will be a bar, too! You just have to get the “wet” section tickets.

Disclaimer: Beck will likely not be in the “wet” section lest he fall from Jesus-blessed grace and return to his bumbling, boozy ways of acting like an inebriated buffoon….He can do that all by himself, without the help of alcohol now, thank you very much!

And if that weren’t reason enough, as of now, no charity has been named to receive the proceeds, which means every dripping red cent will go straight to our own twin towers of freedom and real American heroes of 9/11 Glenn Lee Beck and Sarah Louise Palin. Yay!

Alaska-area promoter Christopher Cox said the date of the event is a coincidence. Cox originally was eyeing Sept. 4, but did not want to compete with the Alaska State Fair, and moved the date to a week later, which worked out better for Beck as well.
“And you know what, it’s a great date for me, for America, for Alaska,” Cox said.

Oooooh, so it’s just a coincidence that it’s on 9/11?? Just like Glenny’s coincidental KKK “Restoring Honor” rally for invalid obese people on the very location and day as Martin Luther King’s almost-as-historic “I Have A Dream” Speech or say, that oddly coincidental Independence Day celebration that freakishly falls on July 4, of all dates!

And to think, I simply thought since the anniversary of the death of the 2,977 innocent men and women incinerated in a fiery blaze of metal, steel, and jet fuel is such a wonderful moment for America, those two li’l angels from heaven simply couldn’t resist! Besides, can you really blame Sarah & Glenn (Glarah) for not wanting to compete with the State Fair, of Alaska?? I know I wouldn’t. So, they’ll just compete with the 9/11 victims instead. Dead people don’t tend to cause too much trouble, anyway!

Which is good because I know at least two people who have some serious blood money to make! We’re talking an absolute killing! Metaphorically speaking of course! After all, they wouldn’t want to offend anyone or anything. Except maybe their sensibilities. Which isn’t worth much anyway.

Grab your “wet” tickets, put on your finest Star Spangled jumpsuit and head due North to ol’ Anchorage, Alaska to celebrate(?) 9/11 in Teabaggin’ style…at the Glenn Beck/Sarah Palin “Accidental, Coincidental Circus Spectacular, The Greatest Show On Earf!”

***Act Now! Because the first 500 patriots get a 100% authentic Koran for the post-show special, “Sean Hannity Presents: Bonfire of the Vanities–The Devil Wears Burka, A Tribute To 9/11,” holy book burning bonanza, at no extra cost!***

With all the smoke and insanity, it’ll be like 9/11 all over again! Minus Rudy Giuliani.

Getcha popcorn ready…Freedom will never be the same again!

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