Well, well, that was faster than dumping an ex-wife in the cancer ward! Whining, bloated, real life Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and serial adultering sac of ethics violations Newt Gingrich has just been declared the Big Wiener of the South Carolina Confederate Republican primary. Hooray! Now all of America can experience the amphibeous-named, Tiffany bling-encrusted, […]
Unless you’ve been living under a rock (no, no, not whatever it is that’s beneath Rick Perry’s perfectly combed, thick brown coif) or have simply been too busy following Sarah Palin’s earth-shattering announcement not to continue duping dumb white people out of their hard-earned money in her ridiculous faux presidential ponzi scheme/grifter bus tour, chances […]
Rejoice, my fellow Americans, the Debtpocalypsegeddon is almost over! America is back on top (of its flaming pile of unpaid bills, bounced checks, borrowed loans, crumpled receipts, IOUs, and angry post-it threats from China!) Woohoo! USA#1! USA#1! USA#1!
After weeks of alternately fucking with, psyching out, and pissing off President Obama by acting like a bunch […]
Ah yes, here it is, the old rusted-out camper, America’s most trusted journalist to warn us all about the evil (gay?) that lurks in the hearts of men. More specifically, Teabagging men who loudly & proudly align themselves with a group named after the hilarious, super-straight act of dipping one man’s testicles in the mouth […]
In these contentious times, there are only so many uncontroversial statements a person can make that pretty much everyone can agree with, like say, “cancer is a terrible disease” or “kicking defenseless puppies in the face is wrong” or “the abuse of children is a terrible thing.”
Umm, wait, except that last one, if you’re evil, […]
Is your child’s summer camp a bit too…umm shall we say, foreign? Are their cabin mates a tad diverse, counselors a bit too Kenyan for your liking?
Well, fear not, fellow patriots! Because the Tampa Liberty School, a 5-day summer camp designed to
to scrub the political correctness out of children’s tender, pre-liberal brainwashed minds, is […]
As you probably already know, the state of the nation can be accurately assessed by reading the fine print between the lines of America’s most trusted, new journalist, the old, rusted-out, 1970s Toyota camper parked outside a local Burger King.
And on this great, new canvas of freedom comes all the poetic brilliance and artful expression […]
Ginni Thomas, the loyal lobbyist Teabagging wife of Supremely silent and Supremely sexy Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas, has taken the next step in her professional journey of weird, quasi-legal, likely immoral influence-peddling conservative jobs, most recently accepting the not-at-all interest conflicting “special correspondent” position at the appropriately special needs wingnut website, The Daily Caller.
Here in America, there are some otherwise seemingly normal people who, upon, hearing the word Muslim, or seeing an actual woman wearing a burqa, suddenly morph into shrieking mindless mobs of ignorant, intolerant bigoted red, white, ‘n blue wretches who just can’t help but hurl racist, vile things (preferably through a megaphone) at innocent young […]
Rejoice obese, saturated fat-clogged ‘mericans ridin’ around on socialized Medicare scooters, waving red, white, and blue flags for the freedom to patriotically die and/or go bankrupt trying to pay for li’l Johnny’s bone marrow transplants.
Victory is yours! Errr, kind of.
Thanks to the latest, greatest, most likely racist old white judge in the confederacy land Roger […]