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No Laughing Matter: Scott Brown's "Model" Justice Is All Of Them But Really Whoever People Like Best

Ah, the smell of manliness and money in the air can only mean one thing: debate time in Massachussets!

Get your abs chiseled, tomahawks chopping, racist Native American war-chants whooping, and get ready to watch Scott Brown show Elizabeth Warren a thing or two about why women are too stupid and weak to win […]

Deck The Halls With Greed & Sorrow, Santa Clause-Killing Repubs Are Coming To Town!

Forget the pesky equal-rights demanding gays or the gross poors, this time the ever-righteous, morally pure Grand Old Prophets of Divinity here on Earth have turned their seething, beautifully white hot, perfectly rational rage towards a much more cunning adversary: the Godless n’er-do-well Democrats.

Ugh, the nerve of those bastards trying to actually get critical legislation […]

Gettin Jiggy Wit It: Big Pimpin' Mark Kirk Won't Let Dem Crazy Coloreds "Jigger" With His Pure, White Senate Election!

Everyone makes mistakes, Mark Kirk just makes a lot of them. Usually, at the absolute worst time possible. Like, say, two weeks before Senate elections, bad timing!

For the most part, Mr. Kirk has managed to keep his lies, distortions, exaggerations, and various f**k-ups out of the prying public eye, save for a few concocted claims […]

How Much Does It Cost For An Old, Washed Up Maverick To Buy His Way Out Of Retirement & Win An Election?

Congratulations America! All your hard work, tireless efforts, and Cindy McCain’s beer money have finally paid off because John McCain, THE John McCain, has officially defeated certified nutjob and
world-famous infomercial star J.D. Hayworth to win Arizona’s Senate seat and return once again to Washington, DC to give the nation another six years (at least!) of […]

“Complete The Danged Fence,” So John McCain Can Keep The Mexicans Out & Himself In The Senate

After losing whatever semblance of a sane mind still remained in the ol’ tank, due to a powerful combination of both the scorching desert heat and a horseback riding nutjob gunning for the old man’s senate seat, John McCain suddenly realized there’s really nowhere farther to fall once you’ve reached rock bottom.

Which can be so […]

Harry Reid's Dirty, Sexy Thoughts On Republicans' Dirty, Sexy, Money

Frustrated over the excruciatingly slow, molasses-like pace of financial reform in the Senate, courtesy of the Grand Obstructionist Party’s reluctance to so much as even open debate (it only took three separate tries!) or move forward in any way, shape, or form (progress is evil!), sweet talkin’ senate majority leader “Dirty” Harry Reid blasted the […]

GOP Bands Together To Form Wall Of "No" To Preserve Their Favorite Wall Of "Ye$"

Oh No, Not Again!

New “bipartisan” financial legislation, supported by the vast majority of poor, hardworking losers like you and me, to help reign in Wall Street and put an end to not-at-all-selfish, bad-mortgage derivatives and other “fun” number games used by major banks to bet against their own investors, and screw over the […]

GOP Tries New, Mature Approach: Biting Their Nose To Spite Their Face

Oops, Reality Must Have Caught Mitch Off Guard Again!

Wah Wah! No fair! She hit me first! He pulled my hair! Wah Wah!

Like everything else they handle so impressively well, the Republicans’ uncanny ability to face facts and accept defeat like mature, responsible adults elected by the people to represent the people, was in full effect […]