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How Do You Know You're In Alaska? The Writing's On The Wall!

Ah, Alaska, where the snow comes whipping down the plain and year-round, sub-zero winter causes pain!

The majestic land of scantily populated outcasts, grizzled mainland failures, migrating moose, and money-grubbing half-term governors of God ‘n guns, whose idea of publicly funded art isn’t a sidewalk mural or main street sculpture, but misspelled, grammatically incorrect chickenscratch scrawled [...]

Sarah Palin Supports The Donald's Crazy, Fake Birther Quest For President Of The United States Of Jesus

Since rich people obviously don’t have to pay taxes in this country we call America (that’s for poor people, silly!), the “haves” and “have-mores” among us must constantly come up with new and creative ways to squander their massive, undeserved fortunes, if only as a gentle reminder how much better, and more well off they [...]

Sarah Palin Says Aloud What The Rest Of Us Silently Wondered, Is Libya A War Or A Squirmish?

Leading Shakespearean scholar and philosopher of Facebook, Dr. Sarah Louise Palin is very confused about what the dickens is going on over in Liberia, err, Latvia, wait, or was it Libya (she can never remember!), and not just because she’s a stupid snowbilly grifter whose IQ is the same number as the average winter [...]

Supreme Court Rules Wacko Westboro Church's Picketing Soldiers' Funerals Is Free Speech; Sadly Same Goes For Sarah Palin's 140-Character Ghostwritten Tributes To Herself

When not granting sleazy mega corporations the same rights, privileges, and fabulous new ability to donate as much cold, hard cash to political campaigns as your average Snuggie-wearing schlub on the sofa stuffing Pringles in his mouth, the Supreme Court is busy doing other vital things, like coming thisclose to unanimously ruling in favor of [...]

Put This In The Brilliant Ideas Department: Sarah Palin Fans Plan To Simultaneously Pull Over To The Side Of The Road For Some Dumb Reason Or Another

What would you do, if you were a tea ‘n freedom lovin’ patriot who despises NObama, adores Lord & Savior Jesus Christ, is borderline obsessed with Sarah Palin, and wanted to make a really BIG statement?

Well, one patriotic, Palin-worshiping group of conservative kooks ‘n cranks, Stand Up America, is encouraging all Jeebus-lovin’ Americans not [...]

Can You Guess The Ingenious Mind Behind The Internet's Best Kept Secret, "Lou Sarah"?

It is no secret Sarah Louise Palin rules the Internets and all things related to it, including ghostwritten 140-character Tweets of indecipherable gibberish no one understands, except Twits, Twats, ‘n Tweens, like say, the original runner up vice-presidential loser/half-term governor and her brood of fellow fame grubbing, ridiculously-named grifters.

So it should come as no surprise [...]

OMG! New Leaked Sarah Palin Tell-All Reveals Sarah Palin Is Not Only A Terrible Person, But A Terrible Email Writer Too!

“A leaked manuscript by one of Sarah Palin’s closest aides from her time as governor charges that Palin broke state election law in her 2006 gubernatorial campaign and was consumed by petty grievances up until she resigned.”

What, what, what!?!? Petty grievances?? Nah, doesn’t sound a bit like her. Not our Sarah Palin! No, no, must [...]

Hooray! Ron Paul Wins CPAC Straw Poll For The Chance To Be President...Of Losing To Obama

Woohoo, wingnut America!

After three days of endless shrieking and shouting about the bountiful beauty of trickle down economics (make it rain, Ronnie Reagan, make it rain!), the unspeakable evils of a woman having rights over her own dumb, slutty body, and, of course, the insufferable Donald Trump going on and on about how much richer [...]

Walk Like An Egyptian...Loudly, Relentlessly, & With An iPhone Twitter App Toward Democracy!

The Egyptian Revolution may not be televised (America don’t take too kindly to Al Jazeera in her parts!) but it will most definitely be Facebooked and Tweeted and re-Tweeted ad nauseum.

Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, we’re free at last!

Err, kind of.

I mean, Hosni Mubarak did finally step down as Egypt’s default [...]

The State Of The Union Is Strong Like...Smoked Salmon & Adult-Onset Diabetes!

Oooh, America, the excitement is in the air! Or maybe it’s just the toxic greenhouse gases slowly asphyxiating Mother Earth now that the Obama Administration up and fired (finally!) its only real environmentalist, fierce tree-hugging hippie, now former White House energy adviser, Carol M. Browner, because who the hell needs a planet anyway?

Certainly not America, [...]