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Gettin Jiggy Wit It: Big Pimpin' Mark Kirk Won't Let Dem Crazy Coloreds "Jigger" With His Pure, White Senate Election!

Everyone makes mistakes, Mark Kirk just makes a lot of them. Usually, at the absolute worst time possible. Like, say, two weeks before Senate elections, bad timing!

For the most part, Mr. Kirk has managed to keep his lies, distortions, exaggerations, and various f**k-ups out of the prying public eye, save for a few concocted claims […]

Only Mark Kirk Is Man Enough (And Straight Enough!) To Lie About Being A Nursery School Teacher

Pop quiz: What kind of man lies about receiving distinguished military awards, his own sexuality (straight as boomerang!), and just for sh*ts and giggles, being a nursery school teacher, way back when he was just a wee college student in New York?

Give up? Why, it’s none other than (closeted) Illinois Republican Senate hopeful, Mark Kirk, […]

The Only Thing More “Schocking” Than Aaron’s Outfit Is That He Claims To Be Straight!

OMG, so like in case you were wondering just who that fashionable hairdresser on the far right of the picture is, and whether his tight l’il behind is available, newsflash!, that colorful ball of fabulousness is none other than conservative GOP congressman of Illinois, Aaron Schock!

And perhaps the only thing more schocking than his flamboyant […]

At Least Mark Kirk Still Wins The Coveted Award For Best Republican Impersonation Of A Moderate, Straight Man!

It’s been several days, (weeks even!) since the last prominent, vehemently anti-gay Republican got outed as a secret, terrible homosexual. This is highly unusual!

So, naturally the time has come to unveil the latest member of the “is-he-or-isn’t-he-a-secret-gay-hypocrite-club,” Illinois Republican and military award exaggerator extraordinaire, the one, the only, Mark Steven Kirk. Hooray!

It’s […]

Unlike Rival Alexi Giannoulias, Mark Kirk Doesn’t Need Family To Make Him Look Bad, He Can Do That All By Himself!

Mark Kirk, At Your Slightly Embellished Service!

Like bees and honey, needles and thread, or Glenn Beck and swastikas, politicians and lies go together like $arah Palin and stupid.

A perfect fit!

When it comes to douchebag politicians lying, misleading, or otherwise bending the truth about which trails they were hiking (like Appalachian paths to hot, extramarital sex […]