|
|
Read My Lips. No New Texans!
It is no secret that God has been keeping all the rain to himself (mastery of the universe sure makes a deity thirsty!) and shooting fire and brimstone at the morality-crazed wingnuts in the American South like some wild, hormone-crazed, undersexed teenager furiously firing BB pellets at empty beer cans [...]
What Would Jesus Do? Let the broke-ass motherf**ker burn baby burn!
I mean what the hell else would El Savior do? Grab a hose, start sprayin’ and save a family’s home, three dogs, a cat, and the now-charred, still-smoldering remains of any human decency still existing in the world??
Wake up, junior! There’s no such thing as [...]
Holy Mental Mormons! Blond haired angel of truth and possibly soon-to-be blind prophet Glenn Beck took to his favoritest radio show, his own, to reveal some very startling news: the divine messenger himself, Glenn Lee Beck, may be dying! OMG!
Err, at least we think so, as Glenn Beck is being very cryptic about the whole [...]
OMG!! So, while we were off stuffing our fat faces full of marshmallow Peeps and Cadbury Creme Eggs in celebration of our Lord & Savior, Jesus Christ’s miraculous resurrection from the sweet hereafter, President Barack Obama was secretly filling out his evil Socialist Census, and what does Mr. Community Organizer go and do?
Finally ‘fesses up [...]
|
Recent Posts
- New Congressional Women’s Caucus Proves You Don’t Have To Be A Man To Hate Women, You Just Have To Be Republican!
- Obama May Not Make The Ballot In Arizona Because Arizona Doesn’t Need A Reason To Be The Dumb, Racist, Backwater Hellhole Everyone Is Embarrassed Of
- Fighting The Good Fight: DemNow’s Interview With The “Che Guevara” Of Comedy, Lee Camp
- Rand Paul Doesn’t Think Obama’s Views On Marriage Could Get Any Gayer, Much Like His Skin Color Couldn’t Get Any Blacker
- Let’s Do The Time Warp Again: President Obama Evolves Back To 1996, Now Supports Marriage For All (Even Gays!!)
- What Women Want: To Open Up Their Legs & Let The Government In!
- Michele Bachmann Knows Her Campaign Was “Mistake-Free” In The Same Way Her Husband Is Gay-Free
- Mitt Romney Sticks To His “It Gets Worse” Campaign, Bravely Allowing His Gay Adviser To Be Bullied Out Of His Job
- When Not Killing Republicans’ Presidential Dreams, Barack Obama Kills The Crowd At The White House Correspondents Dinner
- Justice Antonin Scalia Never Met A Hunt He Didn’t Like, Including Arizona’s “Hunt Brown People” Law
- Minnesota GOP Is So Fiscally Conservative, They’ve Decided To Stop The Whole “Paying Rent” Thing & Join The Rest Of America By Getting Evicted Instead!
- Republicans Commemorate Holocaust Remembrance Day By Reminding Jews That Anti-Semitism Is Alive & Well In The Republican Party (Unlike Jews!)
- Dick Cheney Speaks From The Heart, Now That He Finally Has One
- Chris Christie Fears Americans Are Turning Into Couch Potatoes, Which He Will Then Deep Fry & Stuff Down His Throat
- “It Was A Dark And Stormy (Election) Night…”
|
Democralypse Now is an equal-opportunity satirist exposing stupidity in government and politics, one hilariously scathing post at a time. Like Stephen Colbert, only hotter.
