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Heroic Nazi-hunting Governor Jan Brewer is ready to lead the great Mexican-huntin’, parched desert wasteland formerly known as Arizona, back to its White Power glory days…err, if she could only remember a single reason why or even a single word of her favoritest English language! Warning: It’s very painful. Or as Politico’s Ben Smith notes, “reflects [...] Congratulations America! All your hard work, tireless efforts, and Cindy McCain’s beer money have finally paid off because John McCain, THE John McCain, has officially defeated certified nutjob and Well done, South Carolina, well done! You have surpassed even the lowest, most pathetic expectations to solidify a sullied hallowed place in South Carolina’s great political hall of shame. This is no small feat! Especially in good ol’ South Carolina, where Republican governors hike Appalachian Trails to wild extra-marital sex with hot Argentine mistresses, sexy Republican [...] Mark Kirk, At Your Slightly Embellished Service! Like bees and honey, needles and thread, or Glenn Beck and swastikas, politicians and lies go together like $arah Palin and stupid. A perfect fit! When it comes to douchebag politicians lying, misleading, or otherwise bending the truth about which trails they were hiking (like Appalachian paths to hot, extramarital sex [...] Oh sweet Jesus, this feels good! After months of agonizing GOP shrieks and wild bonfire dancing over the Democrats all-but-certain election Obamageddon, thanks to all the alleged GOP momentum following Scott Brown’s birthday suit surprise victory in Massachusetts, the time has come to laugh, baby laugh your liberal elitist arugula-eating asses off at what happens [...] Oh Walnuts! He’s so frail and confused now that he’s done EVERYTHING he possibly could to win the hearts and minds of rightwing nutjobs, and still finds himself in grave danger of getting the ol’ heave ho courtesy of an initial named madman who goes by the letters J.D. Hayworth. Poor Gramps. Life can be [...] |
 Democralypse Now is an equal-opportunity satirist exposing stupidity in government and politics, one hilariously scathing post at a time. Like Stephen Colbert, only hotter.       
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