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Don't Ask Don't Tell Repeal Finally Goes Into Effect As Society Welcomes Republicans Into The 21st Century Of Basic Human Dignity

Congratulations, America! The moment we’ve all been waiting for—and Republicans have been warning us about—is finally here, and it’s most definitely queer.

At the stroke of midnight on Tuesday, the terrible, nearly two decades old discriminatory policy banning gays and lezzies from being all they can be as loud ‘n proud members of the U.S. military […]

For Once Sarah Palin Actually Stands On The Right Side Of History; Like Always She Manages To Offend Us All

Retired snow bunny, current reality teevee star, and president of Twitterbook, Sarah Louise Palin, is trying her very hardest to be taken seriously as a real, electable politician! Mostly by alternating her precious time pallin’ around bein’ free with Kate Gosselin in majestic, wild Alaska and tweeting 140-character gibberish no one understands all so she […]

No One Asked But McCain's Still Telling...He's A Bitter Old Man Who Hates The Gays Almost As Much As NObama & His Own Pathetic, Miserable Life

Rejoice America because John McCain’s deranged, one-man stinky rotten loser, raging bull destroy-Obama crusade to keep awful gay and lesbian soldiers from admitting they’re in fact awful gay and lesbian soldiers is now as dead as the old man’s last remaining neurons and synapses.

Thanks to the tireless efforts of the usually insufferable but occasionally decent, […]

Lessons In Fierce: Don't Ask Don't Tell Repeal In Senate As Dead As Republicans' Sense Of Decency & Justice

Pump up the Gaga, gays and gals who like gals! Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid finally went ahead with a a cloture vote on the defense spending bill, a procedural move effectively allowing a repeal of Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell to come to the floor for debate, though fortunately not gay and lesbian soldiers […]

U.S. Military Report Finally Asks & Tells, But Republicans Suddenly Can't Hear Or Speak

Oh no, not them pesky ne’r-do-well gays again!

Sure, more and more Americans are increasingly supportive of and comfortable with “gays” and “woman gays” aka “lesbians” serving openly in the military because, umm, last I checked this was the 21st century not the late cretaceous period when John McCain was still just a primordial twinkle in […]

Like Husband, Like Trophy Wife...Cindy McCain Gets Bound & Gagged, Then Flip Flops On NOH8ing Fags

Everyone knows John and Cindy McCain have the bestest, most blissfully beautiful, perfectly God-blessed heterosexual marriage of convenience this great land has ever seen. It’s true!

For her part, Cindy does bring plenty to the table, like her unique, one-of-a-kind rich trophy wife good looks, senile old man appeal, as much of daddy’s hard-earned Anheuser-Busch beer […]

President Obama Finally Agrees To Meet Liberal Bloggers So They Can Maybe Ask & He Can Not Really Tell Why He'll Get To Their Damn Issues One Of These Years

Okay, so 18 looooong, haaaaard months have gone by since President Barack Obama took the oath of office and half the country collectively lost their minds, suddenly afflicted with a severe case of Obama Derangement Syndrome, where once seemingly normal citizens morph into shrieking mobs of obese white supremacists, with bad hygiene and greasy hair, […]

Republican Congressional Hopeful Sean Bielat Knows Short Is The New Gay, So Speak Softly & Carry A Big (Measuring) Stick!

Republican congressional candidate Sean Bielat believes in two simple truths: the power of his own digitally crafted campaign ads of Barney Frank gay dancing across Massachusetts propelling him to certain election victory over that no-good, tax-lovin’ liberal queer with a lisp, and his uncanny ability to apply simple logic to solve complex problems facing the […]

Mirror Mirror On The Wall, Will You Help Me Grow Some Balls & Fulfill My Promise Of Equality For All?

Look you gays, err guys, the Obama administration like totally wants to abolish that terrible, shameful, discriminatory Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell policy, 100% for sure without a doubt. They are like totes behind you on that one!

But, here’s the thing. They are very particular when it comes to actually putting this horrible […]

Breaking News: White House Appeals Don't Ask, Don't Tell Because Who Needs Hope & Change When You Can Have Fear & Injustice Instead?

ANSWER: NONE OF THE ABOVE!

Gay soldiers don’t die, silly, they simply deny!

This just in: President Obama is too pussy to end Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, a policy he thinks is morally reprehensible, constitutionally illegal, and a mockery of justice and equality, but is simply too in love with to be able to quit anyway.

Ummm, hooray??

So, […]