Last month, I told you all about Robert F. “Bob” McDonnell and the skeleton in his closet coming in the form of a 93-page master’s thesis written when Bob was a wee 34-year-old evangelical grad student trying to find his place among the “cohabitators,” “homosexuals,” “fornicators,” “working women,” “feminists,” “abortionists” and the rest of the heathens responsible for this cesspool of sin clogging America’s moral judgment.
Fast forward to Nov. 3 2009, when this nice, God-fearing man has managed to push this decades-old pile o’ bones college-ruled papers back in the storage closet behind all the old linens and photo-albums and handily defeat Democratic challenger Creigh Deeds to assume his rightful place as the new Governor of Virginia. Wooohooo!
This means that Virginia can finally break free from the Socialist grip of last year’s terrible NObama disaster after 44 fabulous years of Republican domination in the state, a period nostalgically known in GOP circles as Pax Virginia.
And with GOP victories of any kind not exactly easy to come by these days, you can be sure the Republicans weren’t about to pass up the chance to prove they’re not just the party of centenarians, secessionists, and off-the-hook chairmen.
“These significant victories speak to the fantastic campaigns run by Republicans across the Commonwealth and the voters’ clear rejection of liberal tax and spend policies that Washington Democrats are trying to force on Americans,” Republican National Committee Chairman Michael Steele said.
House Minority Whip and runner-up in the Republican inappropriate behavior contest Eric Cantor (R-Va.) managed to pry himself away from the Twitter app on his blackberry to congratulate McDonnell supporters on sending a clear message to national politicians (in more than 140 characters): “Enough with the incredible reach of government into our lives.”
“Bob McDonnell has led us to victory after eight dark years in the wilderness…You know what’s so great: Bob ran a great campaign, but it was also a positive campaign.”
Meaning the Republicans didn’t even have to resort to their usual playbook of lying, manipulating and deceiving their way into power. Yay!
Conservative Party candidate and third-wheel surprise in New York’s 23rd Congressional District, Doug Hoffman is hoping this GOPmentum extends to his campaign to return Congress to responsible, conservative hands.
“Hopefully the Republican party, of which I’m a lifelong member, utilizes this energy and excitement of people coming to my support because we’ll need it in 2010,” he said. “We’re just standing up for the core values that made America strong — less government, less taxes, less spending.”
Ah yes, the very definition of George W. Bush’s eight year reign, bringing prosperity and peace throughout the land.
Or at least to the 1,600 acres on his Crawford, Texas ranch.
And lets not forget that McDonnell wrote that thesis of his in none other that Pat Robertson's Regent "University", an institution almost as progressive as Jerry Falwell's Liberty "University".
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