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Congress Declares War On Credit Card Companies And Peaceful Nature Lovers

President Obama and the Democratic demonchildren in Congress finally stuck it to the big, bad credit card companies, passing sweeping reforms aimed at reducing the number of ways credit card companies can screw with unsuspecting consumers like you and me.

The new measure adds protections for debt-stricken credit card users, and does away with hidden charges, extra fees and all the other creative ways credit card try to dupe dumb Americans into buying a bunch of sh*t they can’t afford.

The House of Representative passed the bill by a whopping 361-64 margin, paving the way for Comrade Barry to sign the bill and rescue America from the evil tricks of American Express, Visa, MasterCard, and the like, no matter how much we enjoy their “priceless” commercials reminding us that the best things in life are free, so you might as well throw yourself into debt buying all the cool stuff plastic can buy.

Even Republicans joined Obama’s credit card crusade; they just took a little more convincing that’s all. Luckily, the Democrats were in a very good mood and more than happy to tack on a little “sweetener” to please the GOP, since they know helping the average American isn’t exactly their style.

So, in the spirit of bipartisan cooperation, they made the Republicans an offer they couldn’t refuse: Agree to help protect consumers from getting financially raped by the credit card companies, and they’ll finally let you bring your precious loaded guns into national parks and wildlife refuges.

Which may be a bit risky considering the Republican Party recently replaced the grey wolf on the U.S. list of endangered species.


Guns And Parks: What A Lovely Duo!

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