Twitter | Democralypse Now - The Comically Screwed State Of Politics, In Small, Easy-To-Swallow Bites

Newt Gingrich Sorry 4 H8in’ On NoBama. Jk, Lol!

Nuh-uh, no you didn’t!

Adorable powder-haired human troll Newt Gingrich committed the Republican cardinal sin today when he admitted (gasp!) he was actually wrong on something. And not just on any something, but on a national security matter–the beloved lifeline of the GOP! Their number one area of expertise!

Which means he was also wrong on their [...]

Sarah Palin Now Forced to Quit Vacation For Being Too Famous

Life is hard when you’re the world’s most famous Alaskan!

You can’t do ANYTHING without like a million paparazzi buzzing about, stalking your every move while you and your nice family enjoy an exotic getaway to Barack Obama’s alleged birthplace Hawaii after a grueling few months driving around the country in a giant homage to yourself [...]

Megan McCain Stumped By Clogged Drain; Where’s That "Dumbass" Plumber Joe Now?

While the Senate dithers on about health care and Joe Lieberman does his best to make the entire Democratic caucus go into immediate cardiac arrest, the real action was unfolding in Meghan McCain’s luxurious, handcrafted marble and porcelain tub. Or more precisely, deep in her fine, sterling silver drain.

Somehow, strands of Meggy’s flowing blond locks [...]

Meghan McCain Can’t Understand Why Hollywood Doesn’t See War as Playful Romp Through Gum Drop Forest

Meghan McCain is very upset. And this time, it’s not even ’cause of a bad hair day or ’cause everyone is talking about her bountiful breasts which she took a picture of and posted on Twitter because she loves America that much. Nope, not even close. This time it’s even worse: Hollywood.

Meggy just doesn’t understand [...]

Sen. Charles Grassley is Fond of Tits, Particularly the Public Kind

Sen. Chuck Grassley (R-IA) is no stranger to saying ridiculous things about that terrible Barry man via his rather loose mouth or fast-flying Twitter-trained fingers.

Ol’ Grassley also never passes up an opportunity to use his favoritest word “tit” whenever he humors sniveling, snot-faced journalists with his distinct oratory talents.

Like on C-SPAN’s Washington Journal this morning, [...]

Colorado State Sen. Dave Schultheis’s Bark Isn’t Bigger Than His Bite

Have no fear people, mind-blowing idiocy is alive and well in the state of Colorado! Thanks to the brilliance of yet another saber-toothed GOP state Senator Dave Schultheis, the latest in a long and storied tradition of Republican morons who just can’t figure out how to use all this off-the-hook youth technology without acting like [...]

And The Runners-Up For The Republican Innapropriate Behavior Contest Are…

In all the excitement over Joe Wilson’s tremendous feat of making himself and his dear party look like a bunch of mindless heathens during the president’s speech to America, it is easy to forget the efforts of fellow conservative stars and statesmen Lindesy Graham and Eric Cantor who earned distinguished honors of their own for [...]

What’s A Gang With No Members?

Sens. Grassley And Enzi At Your Service!

Anger bear Sen. Mike Enzi of Wyoming, the second ranking Republican involved in bipartisan health care negotiations, wants to reform health care in much the same way that his superior Sen. Charles Grassley does: by promptly massacring any health care reform bill that comes his way.

This is not [...]

Bachmann 2012? God Willing!

God must really have a thing for hot right-wing politicians with questionable grips on reality and nothing but pure Jesus love in their hearts.

HE is always trying to tempt them with his “higher callings” and cryptic messages from heaven above. First it was devoted servant of the lord Sarah Palin who was forced to resign [...]

Barry Surfs The Internets Just Like You & Me!

It’s the weekend and Barry’s got the comp all to himself! What on earth will dear leader do with his fun playtime alone on the Internets? Will he friend request Queen of the Facebooks Sarah Palin now that she quit running Alaska to take a full time job updating her Facebook status?

Will he hit up [...]