Well, well, that was faster than dumping an ex-wife in the cancer ward! Whining, bloated, real life Stay Puft Marshmallow Man and serial adultering sac of ethics violations Newt Gingrich has just been declared the Big Wiener of the South Carolina Confederate Republican primary. Hooray! Now all of America can experience the amphibeous-named, Tiffany bling-encrusted, [...]
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New (Old) Flavor of the Month (white power chocolate mousse) Ron Paul is no stranger to controversy, thanks to his various racist, sexist and otherwise close-minded policies of limited government, even more limited brain power, and the freedom to be as selfish, asshole-ish, or basically Ron Paul-ish as humanly possible. Like, say, the latest, greatest selection [...] Grab your Gideons, prep your muskets, sharpen your bayonets, throw on your colonial best and head on down to Houston, Texas for the can’t-miss event of the year, the clash of two GOP presidential titans Herman Cain and Newt Gingrich. Wait, did I say can’t miss?? Haha silly me! I meant can’t watch, since no [...] Whether he’s touting his foreign policy skills by grunting nonsense syllables like “Ubeki-beki-beki-beki-stan-stan” or rescuing the nation’s economy by changing from the gold standard of coins to the Godfather standard of pepperoni slices, and installing the wacko, fictional tax plan he stole from SimCity 4 that repeats the arbitrary number “9″ three times while taxing [...] UC Berkeley College Republicans (yes, apparently, they do exist!) are all hot ‘n bothered about a terrible (Socialist?) new affirmative action law by hippie-dippie California governor Jerry Brown that would allow state universities to consider race, gender, ethnicity and national origin in admission applications. Oh the humanity! Because everyone (aka 20-something white Republican males) knows affirmative action [...] Howdy, America! If you haven’t already realized, or have been living under a rock (let’s call her Sarah Palin), the 10-year anniversary of 9/11 is fast approaching, which begs the important question, what are you doing to celebrate freedom this year? Other than the usual neighborhood Mosque burning/BBQ block party/toga fest, of course! But, what about [...] |
 Democralypse Now is an equal-opportunity satirist exposing stupidity in government and politics, one hilariously scathing post at a time. Like Stephen Colbert, only hotter.       
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