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Life is hard when you’re the world’s most famous Alaskan! You can’t do ANYTHING without like a million paparazzi buzzing about, stalking your every move while you and your nice family enjoy an exotic getaway to Barack Obama’s alleged birthplace Hawaii after a grueling few months driving around the country in a giant homage to yourself [...] Famous Alaskan floozy Sarah Palan continued her Going Rogue tour across the Lower 48, thrilling the good folks in small towns and mid-major cities with her wit, charm, and adorable maverick ways. Next stop on Sarah’s whistlestop tour is none other than Minnesota’s world famous Mall of America, where our favorite Alaskan snowflake will delight huge [...] Attack of the Clones! What’s the only thing scarier than Sarah Palin? Why, its two Sarah Palins, of course! But before you start panicking at the sheer thought of not one but two insane Alaskan mavericks Goin’ Rogue all over the Lower 48, stay calm, take a deep breath (or ten), and relax for a second, people. [...] Rogue author and GOP sexpot from the snowy north Sarah Palin graced us sinners and traitors in the Lower 48 to talk about her favorite subject other than herself (no not Facebook, Levi Johnston of course!) on that popular chocolate lady’s television show, Orpah, Oprah or whatever it’s called. Speaking to [...] To the millions of Americans who wasted an entire afternoon on Thursday glued to their TVs watching in horror as the fate of a 6 year-old boy was dangling in a homemade helium balloon flying wildly out-of-control for more than 50 miles, hahahahaha you’ve been punk’d! Turns out the responsible, caring parents who thought it would [...] Oooooh, golden-haired angel of truth Glenn Beck has landed on the cover of TIME magazine!! Do you understand what this means people? It means the true patriots of America have won! But even more importantly, it means everything the man’s ever said is totally brilliant and 100 percent true. Sure, the feature story is titled “Mad [...] What in the world could be in worse shape than the loose, flabby skin on the once morbidly obese body of Mike Huckabee? Why, it’s the sorry state of Journalism, of course! It’s hard to believe that every once in a while in this hedonist playground we call America, terrible and offensive behavior is not rewarded with book deals and talk shows, but actually brings with it certain consequences. Like in the case of Fox News host Glenn Beck, who experienced first-hand the sort of financial penalty that [...] |
 Democralypse Now is an equal-opportunity satirist exposing stupidity in government and politics, one hilariously scathing post at a time. Like Stephen Colbert, only hotter.       
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