I’m sure by now you’ve heard about that crazy guy James Lee who was maybe strapped with a bomb, but most definitely armed with a gun when he stormed the Discovery Channel(!?) headquarters in Maryland and took three people hostage before being shot and killed by police, who rescued the baffled, frightened Discovery employees, suddenly [...]
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OMG America! Now that Levi and Bristol’s heart-warming, 15 minute simultaneous engagement/un-engagement on the cover of tween tabloid US Weekly is officially over (or at least for the next few days), America has been waiting breathlessly for something, anything to keep us going without our two favoritest dysfunctional Arctic lovebirds by our side to keep [...] OMG, get your tuxes out, (gay) ladies and gentleman who reside in the soon-to-be same-sex cesspool of sin & sodomy of Gayifornia! A week after permanently destroying the moral fabric of America with one stroke of his Prop 8-killing gavel, Judge Vaughn Walker, elitist liberal activist Judge Vaughn Walker has struck at the heart of hetero [...] Like any Mama Grizzly worth her weight in fat and fur, Sarah Palin doesn’t take too kindly to strangers, especially dumb librul ones, getting too close to her or her precious li’l cubs. And much like any vicious, aggressively defensive wild animal feeling the slightest bit threatened, any hapless intruder is met with a swift, [...] Check ‘Yes’ For Crazy! You may remember Sharron Angle, the crazy Teabag lady from Nevada hoping to unseat meek ol’ Mormon Harry Reid as Senate Majority Leader with her wonderful, forward-thinking ideas like how to make deliciously refreshing lemonade out of getting incestuously raped and impregnated by your father (eat one of her famous zesty lemon [...] ARGHHHH, Help Bristol, Some Weird Thing Is Touching Me!! Beloved Arctic heartthrobs Bristol Palin and Levi Johnston decided why the hell not give Us Weekly a little more of the gossipy good stuff, who in turn decided why the hell not place the BRISTOLing interview with the li’l lovebirds in their “Healthy Lifestyle” section of their [...] It’s always refreshingly eye-opening to see how other cultures view America’s various power-hungry demagogues and fraudulent national celebrities embarrassments, especially when that culture happens to be of the Asian variety, where every last one of us will likely be employed as factory workers in the near future, making cheap, poorly constructed products to sell [...] |
 Democralypse Now is an equal-opportunity satirist exposing stupidity in government and politics, one hilariously scathing post at a time. Like Stephen Colbert, only hotter.       
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