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Traditionally Dumb Indiana High School Teacher Demands Traditional Prom Free From Gross Gay Kids

Ooooh look, America, another day, another crazy Christian crusadin’ against them darn gays and lezzies! But don’t get mad at her for hatin’ on the hell-bound homosexuals and their deviant lifestyles, get mad at God for making them that way.

You know, deep, sensitive, progressive, fashion-forward, freshly groomed and all the other terrible ways […]

Are You On The NRA's Hit List? If You're A Human With A Conscience, The Answer Is Yes

Are you a Jew, woman, college graduate, lawyer, Latino, young person, black person, nurse, police officer, Episcopalian, celebrity or anyone else who doesn’t feel a burning urge to pump hundreds of hollow-point rounds into small, defenseless animals and/or innocent schoolchildren?

Well then, WATCH OUT because the National Rifle Association is locked, loaded, and aiming ready to […]

What Would Gun Nuts Do? Heckle The Mourning Father Of Slain Six-Year-Old Newtown Boy For Having A Heart (And Brain)

When is the right time to stand up for something you believe in? Is it after your 6-year-old child is shot dead in his classroom, along with 25 other people (mostly children) by some lunatic with an assault rifle and endless rounds of ammo? Is it during a Connecticut legislative hearing on stricter gun control […]

Tea Party Leaders Know The Sandy Hook School Massacre Wasn't Caused By Machine Guns Or Mental Illness, But By The Deadly Combo Of Premarital Sex & Sagging Pants

The Times They Aren’t A Changin’: A Gun-Control Ad From 1981

In the wake of the unspeakable tragedy of the Sandy Hook shootings, people have been clamoring for answers about why it happened. Logical ones, or at least those with functional brains, have come to the conclusion that it probably had something to do […]

Mr. Smith Goes To Washington To Kill The Polar Bears & Fight The Threat Of Knowledge

Can I Get A Hand, Lamar?

Hey America, remember all those binders full of women the GOP had stashed away, waiting to free from their three-ringed cages and unleash a wave of estrogen-filled pragmatism upon the land?

Neither do Republicans. Instead they’ve decided that old white men are really the only diversity they need, particularly […]

Failed Family Values Republican Candidate Proves He's Still #1 At Beating His Wife

Stop me if you’ve heard this before: A wingnut Republican from some bumblef*ck place in the South is caught abortin’, fornicatin’, beatin’, lyin’ or pretty much doing the one terrible, non-Jesusy thing they are always shrieking about, other than that black feller in the White House.

Like the newest member of the fraternity of Grand Old […]

The Spy Who Shagged Me: General Petraeus Taken Out By Bizarre Love Triangle Not Bullets

Another day, another hot steamy CIA sexytime affair threatening to bring down more and more of the military’s brightest minds and busiest loins with each passing, sexually harassing, medal-and-misogynist-filled moment.

By now, I’m sure you all know about David Petraeus, the retired four-star general and (now former) director of the CIA, who made the terrible mistake […]

New Totally Non-Racist Ohio Ad Kindly Asks Black People To Vote For Mitt Romney Because Abraham Lincoln Freed The Slaves, Duh!

Wassup black people? This one stock photo black guy with a booming voice and weird Mormon-ish look about him has a MAJOR REVELATION for you, black Americans living in Ohio.

Now take off your Beats by Dre Headphones and listen because this is important (unlike say, you people, in non-election years).

It is a BIG […]

Cindy McCain Would Feel Your Pain America, If She Wasn't Too Busy Feeling The Golden Warmth Of Sunny San Diego

Cindy of McCain fame, not to be confused with the equally destructive Sandy of Hurricane fame, took a break from her very important life rolling around in freshly minted $100 dollar bills to let the whole world know she is loving life right now…in sunny San Diego!

Hooray!

Not only is the sun shining and birds chirping, […]

Dreams Of My Fatherland: Wingnut Arkansas Rep. Jon Hubbard Pens Tribute To Slavery & Nazism Proving Little Rock Isn't Just A Capital, But What's Between Their Ears

Arkansas Representative Jon Hubbard (R-Whitelandia) isn’t afraid to speak his mind, probably because eating paint chips was part of a balanced breakfast growing up in Arkansas.

Because much like other disturbed Hubbards before him, L. Jon Hubbard (The L stands for lunatic) has an unconventional way of looking at things, specifically the merits of slavery (hard […]