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Breaking News: Ann Coulter Fails To Realize Wingnut HomoCons Have Feelings Too!

Say you’re a confused gay or lesbian patriot who hates taxes almost as much as terrible, no-good moral fabric-destroying minorities such as your own deviant homosexual self.

Now pretend, there’s actually a whole group of fellow self-loathing wingnut queers (let’s call them GOProud, shall we?) who just like you and Patty Hearst, can’t help but align […]

Is There A New Kim On The Block?

Oooh, Something Tells Me Things Are Gonna Be Different Now!

Unlike in hideous, Constitutional abiding, Democratic America, over in the bad Korea, they know how to do politics the right way: no voting, no campaigns, no food for the people, no contact with the outside world, no freedom whatsoever, no money for anyone except Dear Leader, […]

Republicans Unveil Pledge To Rid America Of Silly Solutions, Gross Diversity, And Deviant Liberal Equality

Like any other decent white patriot worth their weight in teabags and KFC Double Downs, you too probably spent your weekend basking in the sweet (segregated) glory of the GOP’s new Pledge to America, the biggest, brightest, most gamechangingest idea yet to get that no-good Blacky NObama out of the White House and back where […]

You Know What They Say About GOP Candidates Who Use Big Fonts To Fake A Jobs Plan...

Let’s say you’re a Republican candidate somewhere in America, like say, maybe Wisconsin, for instance, and  unemployment is rampant because the actual ‘middle class’ heart of our economy has died, forever, plus you stand for “small government” or whatever, so you can’t actually propose anything, but you still need to talk about jobs because in […]

Thanks To Republicans, America Isn't Just Safe From Gays, But Immigrant Children & Their Gross, Immigrant Ways

Rejoice America! Because yesterday, while Senate Republicans — some of the most sexually open, secure people in the entire world — were patriotically filibustering the very idea of debating the possibility of maybe repealing Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, giving terrible gays and lezzies the right to die for their country, the Grand Obstructionist Party were […]

Yay! Republicans Heroically Vote To Keep Our Military Safe From Scary Ladies In Meat Dresses & Even Scarier Ga-Ga Gays!

OMG! Guess what little gay and lezzy monsters across America?? Your little “rights” struggles are over! Done, dunzo, finito, Ga-Ga-gonzo!

Oh, wait never mind, you’re all still totally screwed, despite Lady Gaga donning a hotttt meat dress, and p-p-p-poking her face all around Maine, trying to convince the last two “moderate” (aka not completely insane) Senator […]

Who The Hell Is 'Orora' & What Has It Done To America's Most Cherished Online Cheerleader Sarah Palin?

Since holding an actual elected position is clearly beneath her Arctic highness Sarah Palin (the only qualified person in America to do anything), perhaps more suited to her “skills” would be to function as an effective wingnut “cheerleader,” based purely on her experience in patriotically quitting the only elected statewide office she’s ever […]

Vote Christine O'Donnell For All Your Freaky Faux Feminist, Anti-Masturbation, & Wild Witchcraft Needs!

Open Wide If You’re Crazy!

Everyone knows Delaware’s time zone is approximately ten years behind New York (depending on which part of the state you call home), and with its last shining moment coming way back in 1787 as the first state to ratify the Constitution of the United States, it’s been pretty much downhill […]

Americans (Reluctantly) Decide Gays Can Be Families Too...Even If They're Probably Going To Burn In Eternal Hell

Congratulations, nation! A new poll finds that a majority of Americans now think same-sex couples with children and married gays without kids (or the blessings of the Lord?) should count as “a family.”

Not everyone, though! Not everyone is convinced that a committed relationship between two men or two women (gasp!) is as God-blessed, pure, and […]

Delaware's O'Donnell Disaster Doesn't Believe In Masturbation Or Climate Change, Just The Power Of The Lord, Sarah Palin, To Make Her Senator

Rep. Mike Castle (R-DE) Stands Alone

Eh, now turns out Castle’s actually not standing at all anymore, thanks to Sarah Palin endorsed doomed candidate and anti-masturbation crusader Christine O’ Donnell, the born again, slightly less adorable, substantially more crazy hell version of that cute Circle of Friends/Scent of a Woman actor with the same namesake minus […]