Human defect Dick Cheney continued his increasingly bizarre whirlwind tour across America, bringing his unique brand of doom to select cities around the country.

Most recently, Dick took his new role as the world’s creepiest chatterbox to New York City, so he could watch his sexually confused (aka lesbian) daughter Elizabeth make him proud by spewing […]

North Vs. South, Redux

Red states are movin’ out! America’s cuckoo southern friends have finally tired of the snooty, upper crust ways of us northern heretics and have decided to press their luck alone, without us slave-hating states to keep them down.

First, it was Texas who threatened to secede from this godless Union on account […]

Umm, yeah, this is gonna be awkward. So I’m just gonna go ahead and save you the suspense: It’s his kid.

You already know pretty boy family man John Edwards was running around screwing some broad–er make that his mistress–while he ran for president of the world and his wife battled cancer. He’s just […]

Oh no! While America was being distracted by the pig AIDS pandemic, a much scarier virus was busy creeping across our fair land.

I’m talking of course about the dreaded gay marriage bug tearing through the Northeast this spring, easily taking Ben and Jerry’s hedonist commune Vermont, before striking New Hampshire, and now Maine. We’re talking […]