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OMG, Like, WTF!? Meghan McCain Doesn’t Understand Why No One Wants To Be A Republican

Sassy blogger Meghan McCain is in the closet. And not the kind reserved for gays, but something far, far worse: liberals.

Which is why she is so totally bummed that nice old man Arlen Specter decided to ditch the Grand Old Party for greener pastures in Democratic happy land.

You see, Meghan has tons of respect for […]

What A Long Strange (100 Day) Trip It’s Been!

100 down, 265 to go. Repeat three times and voila! Barack Obama’s first term is officially in the history books. What a wild ride it’s been so far!

So, what has Barry managed to accomplish in his first 100 days in office, aside from insult the Special Olympics and the entire disabled community, hobnob with Hollywood […]

Obama Uses Air Force Photo Op As Fun Excuse To Terrorize Wall Street

Well, well if it isn’t Barack Obama once again terrorizing the good people of this country–including his favorite target, the innocent lambs on Wall Street.

This time, it wasn’t his usual arsenal of executive pay caps, increased government oversight, and sensible tax policies that sent New Yorkers into a tizzy, but something far, far more sinister: […]

Sen. Arlen Specter Abandons Sinking Ship, Jumps Aboard Obama’s Democratic Hope Train

OMG, breaking news! Pennyslvania Senator Arlen Specter has finally crossed over to the dark side and joined the godless Democrats, moving them one-step closer to the coveted 60-seat filibuster-proof majority. And moving Republicans one step closer to absolute and utter irrelevance.

Specter’s decision to join Comrade Barry’s Democratic revolution comes after realizing his party has become […]

Torture, Pig Flu, Sleeping Economists, Oh My!

Hollywood Squares, Crazy Global Edition!

What a week it’s been here in the good ol’ USA. That is, if you’ve managed to survive the latest import from our friendly southern neighbor (and not fun illegal stuff like drugs), but the lovely swine flu outbreak. Gracias Mexico! Nothing’s sexier than dirty pig disease.

If you still have your […]

Al Gore Spars With Newt Gingrich, GOP Over Earth’s Right To Exist

Former vice president turned environmental warrior Al Gore is on a mission to make up for blowing the 2000 elections by single-handedly saving the planet from certain smog-filled doom.

Not content just sitting at home, polishing his Nobel Prize medal and Academy Award statuette with Tipper, Al took his climate change busting butt straight to Congress, […]

Crazy President Obama Thinks College Should Be Affordable, Accessible

Y’all Watch Out Now!

The man allegedly known as President Barack Hussein Obama is on the attack again. This time, the latest victim of his terror campaign is none other than the (soaring) cost of higher education.

On Friday, President Obama did what he does best–other than read from teleprompters–by dazzling the media with policy ideas that […]

Texas Threatens To Secede; America Offers To Help Pack Bags

Okay, so Texas is all giddy-upped over the idea of succeeding from this godless wasteland, and the rest of America couldn’t be more thrilled!

Sure, we’ll miss the alarmingly high rates of illiteracy, poverty, violent crime, and fashion victims, not to mention, being the undisputed world leader in executions, but somehow we will find the will […]

How McCain’s VP Choice Went From Cranky Jew To Crazy Shrew

Remember when John McCain went nuts-o and decided to select that Alaskan floozy Sarah Palin as his running mate even though her only qualifications were having female reproductive organs, a pretty face, and some of the god damn funniest lipstick jokes the world has ever heard.

If it seemed suspicious, that’s because McCain never wanted to […]

Battle Of The Bulge: Are Fatties To Blame For Global Warming?

Hey fatties, guess what?? It’s YOUR fault the earth is getting hotter, rain forests are disappearing, icecaps are melting, and all the polar bears are dying.

That’s right. Thanks to a recent scientific study, we now know that a person’s heart isn’t the only thing to suffer from stuffing your face with endless wheelbarrow sized portions […]